Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Randomize
