She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
