we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
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