I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
