Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Randomize