I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
why is half of my head shaved?
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize
