He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Randomize
