so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
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