if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
