I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
