where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
i wish my penis had a tongue
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
