i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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