a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Randomize
