I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Randomize
