the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
