the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
