i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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