halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
