Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
