You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
Randomize
