I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
