Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Randomize
