He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Randomize