So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Randomize
