No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Randomize
