so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
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