she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Randomize
