Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
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