she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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