I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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