I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
