is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
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