He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
i think my cat just said my name.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
