So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦🏼♀️
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Randomize
