but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize
