He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
