Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
Randomize
