Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
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