He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity�
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
You made out with two different species that night
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Randomize
