What a fucking waste of an outfit
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.�
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Randomize
