You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
