Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
