Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
