good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Randomize
