Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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