He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Randomize
