We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
