She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
MIDGETS
????
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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