Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Randomize
