its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Randomize
